Four words

I am here today courtesy of a wise spider.

This particular arachnid magi bit me on the toe on Sunday. My toe was getting painful & infected so I took myself off to the doctor last night & now when I would normally be attempting to stay awake in a sterile office, I’m home with space & time & quiet to read & think & question. My adopted cat is asleep on the mat at my feet. For these free hours I am an unrushed, spacious, wondering human.

One of the books I’m reading at the moment is about finding values – could be classed as “New (‘Mew’ if you’re a cat) Agey’, but I’m enjoying it & it has synched in with my leonine journey.

Anyway I read something the other day that I wanted to pass on.

A short while ago I brought up the subject of ‘needs‘ with a friend at work, because the traditional answer to what we need to survive always pisses me off – you know the ‘food, water, warmth & shelter’ answer. “What about fun” says I – imagine if fun was a need‘!

So returning to my book, the writer suggests that living is NOT a need, because we can choose to die (all too often people do). What a freeing notion don’t you think – living is not a need! I guess it makes it a value. Anyway the author goes on to quote another who believes there are four main requirements for life – & these I adore –

Love, Fun, Mastery & Freedom

My choice in understanding what is being said is that ‘in order to value living & thus desire to live, these are the absolute essentials’.

The addition of ‘mastery’ is exquisite is it not? For what can compare with the sense of delight that comes from personally creating or learning & achieving that which you most desire.

Anyway I’m off back to the couch to read & think & muse some more.

February 24, 2009. Uncategorized.


  1. Devin replied:

    Boy those couldn’t be more right!! What an incredible ‘personal’ type synch-while I was at the dentists today before getting in -I was reading a book that had different mens and womens views in history about how ‘flat’ and ‘wooden’ regular reality that we are all taught to see from childbirth is!! best to you as always! more fun more freedom and more mastery too!

  2. wise woman replied:

    Hi DevinI do love synching up with my friends – makes us seem less far apart :)So that was a great way of putting it the "'flat' and 'wooden' regular reality that we are all taught to see from childbirth" – I think that exactly what is happening – we are taught to see 'flatly' – something happens to our vision that stops us from 'seeing' – damn I wish I could get a better grasp on this idea!!Thanks for visiting & I wish you huge amounts of love, fun, freedom & mastery too :)

  3. StrangEye replied:

    I’m very sorry to read about your injury Wise.That`s the trouble with those pesky spiders, we always underestimate them.Sometimes we just can’t help but get a little too overly bold and adventurous. Believing that we’re the only thing at top end of the food chain, off we go treading where we should never have in the first.We’re just so busy with our hectic schedules and agendas that we step without really looking.I mean, how often do we really take a good look at where it is we’re actually treading and what amazing and beautiful creatures we may accidently destroy along the way? I’ve also wondered why is it so impossible for those equally bothersome creepy crawlers and those nasty stinging and biting things (that probably believe they’re so safe with their natural camouflage) as they scurry about in the dark, to escape a spider’s web!?Yet the spider can navigate the finest threads with ease.How lucky you are to be bitten and survive! Some of those things can be quite deadly! But what a blessing it is for you as well. Without that spider bite on your big toe, you’d haven’t this wise story to share with your friends!Cheers,be well.Tread lightly!

  4. Nightghost replied:

    Wow!! Love your 4 needs. Best things I have read. Thanks

  5. Michael Skaggs replied:

    Well done, bravo.Your lioness at your feet should have prevented that spider attack. ;)P.J. ate one the other day [my black and white kitty], I watched him devour it and said “ewww, don’t come over and lick my face afterwards thank you.” I really enjoyed this quick uplifting “blurb”, and can imagine how tranquil and right it must feel to be away from the “job” and relaxing and doing what you “need”.We had a blizzard here in my area two days ago, unfortunately I spent 5 hours doing snow removal and called out from “the job”. I was so tired and in such pain from the snow removal that I didn’t get to really do what “I needed”. First time I took pain reliever in years. My body felt like I had just run a marathon! Hope your toe gets better soon! You don’t have poisonous spiders in NZ do you Wise?Be well my friend.Word verify is GEMED

  6. wise woman replied:

    Hi StrangEyeThanks for your concern – as Michael queried we don't have much of a problem with poisonous spiders – when I was growing up there was only the Katipo which was found in driftwood so not a big threat (& rarely fatal) – now we have more – coming in shipping containers I think. Nothing deadly but some can be nasty.I have always loved having Wednesdays off work – the longest, slowest day of the week for me & I took it as a signal that I needed to take some time to look at the direction I would like to head plus I had a chance to continue my leonine search – which was awesome I might add!All the best

  7. wise woman replied:

    Hi NightghostBrilliant aren't they – shines a whole new light on 'living'.All the bestHiya MichaelI was gardening – my landlady had 'suggested' putting up my rent by $15 a week so someone could clear my jungle!PJ has strange tastes – though I think I remember an old wives cure for a cold was to eat a spider – maybe PJ thought she was curing your 'cold' !!I'm sorry to hear that you're having to slog your guts out – hope your weather improves. My toe is a lot better today thanks :)All the best to you & the kitty clan.

  8. Know Nothing replied:

    It’s always nice to read someone elses rules for living. I like the Mastery one. My father told me that it was better to be a master of one trade than a jack of all.These 4 words should be certainties of life. Your post reminded me of the phrase below and how much I have always hated it.” the only things you can count on in life are death and taxes “Time for some new words to live by, thanks Wise

  9. wise woman replied:

    Hi Mr KnowI'm with you all the way – definitely time for some (all??) new words.Yep I thought mastery was 'stellar' – it comes with a feeling of being 'effective' & power-filled – instead of this all too common feeling of being like a piece of limp lettuce.Love, fun, mastery & freedom to you :)

  10. Ben Emlyn-Jones replied:

    It’s good to hear someone define the purpose of life differently to the Conformist values that are piled onto us every day. In addition to the way WW put it I’d say “Money, power, status and property” which is kind of a refined version of the article’s stated conventional values.Thanks for that one, WW. Hope your toe gets better soon (Boy, am I glad we don’t get spiders like that in England!)

  11. wise woman replied:

    Hi BenGood to hear from you.I think you summed up todays ‘meaning of life’ rather succinctly with “Money, power, status and property” – bugger I’m in trouble!! My toe is almost better thanks – I believe the spider in question was an Aussie import!I hope you are well

  12. Nina replied:

    i look at needs as being from a mental, emotional, physical and spiritual perspective, in layers, each serving a value–all of them intertwined together (likely very much like the home of that spider who decided to munch on your toe). my mind has a need to always learn something new, to find that sense of awe and feel a sense of accomplishment. emotionally, i need to feel appreciated, heard, etc. physically, food, water and movement to feel well and of course, to physically remain alive. spiritually, to connect with all that’s around me and take time to bypass the junk in my head to find the quiet voice w/in and w/out. i also love the 4 you mentioned. fun and mastery are a must for certain–needs i need to attend more to!hope you are healed up by now.

  13. Ben Emlyn-Jones replied:

    I’m OK thanks, WW. I still drop in on your blog whenever I can. Glad your toe’s on the mend after your encounter with the Shelob. I’m looking forward to seeing Matt Delooze live at the end of the month. I’ll send him your greetings.

  14. wise woman replied:

    Nina, lovely to hear from you & I loved that you spoke your needs.A very good friend has suggested that our 'wants' ARE our 'needs' & I so think he is right.I wish you each & every one of your needs & I can well identfy with them too!All the very best to youHi BenOh my dear I do understand – it is not easy keeping up with all the great blogs out there plus researching ours & doing all the other things we have to do. But I have long appreciated your friendship & support.Have fun with Matt – you lucky bugger :)All the best to you too

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