me meme

Human instincts can be ignored when
is made to seem to be …

… a matter of survival

~  ~  ~

 “a preoccupation with identity
for many people …

… is a way of life

~  ~  ~

People who live in the first-person orientation have,
as their frame of reference,


Such questions as Who am I? take on a high magnitude of importance.  The focus is on me, me, me


What if this ‘me‘  frame of reference is …

... prison sell?

Let’s ask a question.

What is identity?


identity     c.1600, “sameness, oneness,” from M.Fr. identité (14c.), from L.L. (5c.) identitatem … “sameness, …  abstracted from identidem “over and over“.


The distinct personality of an individual regarded as a persisting entity; individuality.

The quality or condition of being the same as something else.”

Ummm …… pardon?

individuality AND being the same as something else

When & how did sameness come to mean individuality?

If identity is a word with more than a dash of double-speak, should we identify ourselves with it quite so readily?

Is there a reason why identity is so vital if you want to ‘be someone‘?

Discussions of face invariably refer to the concept of self …‘image of self’ … public self-image’ …  an ‘identity-boundary issue’…  and the ‘self as a communicative identity.”

Facebook has brought a new  focus of how people construct their identities online, demonstrating that identity is not just a process or list of attributes, but rather a dramatic performance in which one’s  identity never remains static – it is constantly undergoing construction

Facebook: A Generation’s Identity Archive … you’re always presenting the identity you want to present – you never have to worry about the identity you used to present

Or alternatively …

The first substantial difference of the Facebook-age is that identity is more closely intertwined with our pasts. While it is easier to catch up with your camp bunk-buddy, it is also more difficult to reinvent yourself. Facebook walls and pictures allow any curious onlooker to be a few clicks away from getting at least the gist of your high school, and maybe even middle school

Facebook – the cult of identity?  How many people who denounce Scientology actively attend Facebook?

Facebook is no longer just a current method of identity presentation, it is an archive of our digital identity

Why is identity/self-focus mandatory in this modern world?

Does ‘identity’ lead us further & further away from any real chance of connection with the world?

the first-person orientation is rampant in the human potential movement, where the focus is blatantly on self …

… sense of self, working on self, finding your truth, being one with yourself, developing yourself, reaching self-enlightenment, fulfilling yourself & so on … “Everyone is my mirror” … is a way of seeing everyone else in terms of you.  Yet if you attempt to reduce all the  individuals you know into being a reflection of you,

you will miss them

Approaches based on self-love only serve to drive your focus more & more on the self.  This obscures the separation needed in the act of creating, so you will be less effective over time

What if over-focusing on ourselves makes us poorer, weaker, sadder?

Let’s re-spell identity & ask some questions.

What if Id Entities feast on self-centred minds?

Id, ego and super-ego are … defined in Sigmund Freud’s structural model of the psyche …  the id is the set of uncoordinated instinctual trends; the ego is the organised, realistic part; and the super-ego plays the critical and moralising role.

The id is unconscious by definition:

It is the dark, inaccessible part of our personality … we call it a chaos, a cauldron full of seething excitations… It is filled with energy reaching it from the instincts, but it has no organization, produces no collective will

In the classic 1956 movie Forbidden Planet, the destructive forces at large on the planet Altair IV are finally revealed to be “monsters from the id” — destructive psychological urges unleashed upon the outside world through the … “mind-materialisation machine.

the forces of the Id … have great power and cannot be repressed indefinitely since they supply the basic drives and motive force of the personality. The Id will try to reassert itself by manufacturing strange dreams and even physical symptoms. If the conscious mind ignores the warning signals then the Id will begin to twist the person up

Do our modern, self-obsessed …

cults of Identity 

… create monsters of the id by forcing attention to the surface of self & holding it there?

Is self-focus essential?

Another orientation people can live in is third person … focus is not on yourself, but rather outside yourself.  In a third person orientation you are capable of establishing relationships, because … the duality … created between you & something else … helps create distance, separation & greater perspective …

While Who am I? …
is one of the major questions in the first-person orientation, …

… What is truly going on? …
is one of the major questions in the third person.  

In the first person, identity is of great importance; in the third person, truth is of greater importance.  In the first-person orientation, there is often a tremendous amount of sentimentality but little real compassion.  In the third person, there is often real compassion & less sentimentality.”


Have we gotten trapped in a mirror-level of (un)reality –

… hovering eternally on & around the surface of ourselves?

surface     1610s, from Fr. surface “outermost boundary of anything, outside part” (16c.), from O.Fr. sur- “above” + face

Have we constructed our identities from the surfaces of very fake mirrors?

If we loosely followed Freud’s 3-tiered model, we might suggest we are being shepherded & then concreted into the realm of ego/identity.

I have chatted with Celtic Rebel about the dangers of fame – even wondering if fame might be some sort of ‘entity’ – for it seems to take over the human & create a life of its own.  He in turn has suggested that perhaps it is the …

… cementing in place of a persona that causes the problems.

Once an identity is formed does the individual begin to disappear?

Identity is theft of the self”  ~ Estee Martin

If the individual disappears, so does life.

For life is so vibrant & dynamic that it compels …

… individuality on every level.

Can sameness be viewed as a form of inbreedingnever a healthy option.


Does identity compel sameness?

Why have we allowed ourselves to become so identified with identity?  So obsessed with ourselves.

Is it because it makes us feel safe?

Sometimes people … are so attached to their ideas that they feel threatened if their outlooks are challenged … ideas can function as a matter of identity

What if that which we have used to protect ourselves, is lethal?

And M.E. I eat dust
We’re all so run down
I’d call it my death
But I’ll only fade away
And I hate to fade alone
Now there’s only M.E.

We were so sure
We were so wrong
But there’s no one left to see
And there’s no one left to die
There’s only M.E.

Why shoud I care
Why should I try
Oh no, oh no
I turned off the pain
Like I turned off you all

Now there’s only M.E

It’s interesting to see how ‘ME’ has a big hand …

… in the business of death.

In Frozen minds I got to wondering about how much destruction may be caused by the incessant focusing upon ourselves.

You know I think we’ve been very deliberately steered into this obsession.


I don’t know, but perhaps, because it weakens or ‘unmans‘ us.

Do you remember the popular movie trick of using mirrors to trick the eyes of security guards …

… or deflect alarm systems.

Well, what if the reflections from the silver screens & all their golden identities …

… somehow disabled our own warning systems & drove us into …

… mirror-madness?

What if the result of over-self-focus, is fear & illness – mental &/or physical?

I have struggled with what is labelled Chronic Fatigue Syndrome for a number of years – not enough to incapacitate me, but more than enough to restrict my life.

Since my uprooting & move to my new home, it has kicked in quite badly.  During this time there has also come a new understanding about how extreme anxiety crippled my family – something in the combination of these two events led me to wonder if CFS could be caused by an overwhelmed nervous system.

A little research led a long way.

Myalgic Encephalomyelitis, or … M.E. for short, is widely used interchangeably to describe Chronic Fatigue Syndrome

Unbelievable – how often does truth stare us in the face & we glaze over?

So a journey begins – I start by acknowledging the extreme anxiety that has walked with me for a very long time – & I notice how much this anxiety always turns me ‘back in upon myself‘.

I find a site which suggests that CFS has everything to do with the brain’s guard dog, …

… the amygdala, staging unrelenting & brutal counter-attacks
on anything deemed fearful:

The Amygdala Hypothesis – a ‘vicious cycle‘ that, once triggered by severe stressors in people with certain risk factors can perpetuate neurological overstimulation, physiological dysfunction, and many physical symptoms

It is believed that the amygdala stores highly charged emotional memories, such as terror and horror and it has been shown that the amygdala becomes very active when there is a traumatic threat

This provided a hearty meal for thought.

Just how much may we have we been affected by …

… anxiety.

I have seen anxiety everywhere & I have also seen how no one will voice it out, except in the acceptable, given terms we were supplied with.  What the fuck does “I’m so stressed” actually mean?

It may be vital to understand anxiety & what it does to us.

Anxiety is a generalized mood condition that can often occur without an identifiable triggering stimulus. As such, it is distinguished from fear, which is an emotional response to a perceived threat. Additionally, fear is related to the specific behaviors of escape and avoidance, whereas anxiety is related to situations perceived as uncontrollable or unavoidable. Another view defines anxiety as “a future-oriented mood state in which one is ready or prepared to attempt to cope with upcoming negative events“, suggesting that it is a distinction between future vs. present dangers which divides anxiety and fear

I really do think now that the majority of people in the Truth Movement have been exposed to, or suffered from, extreme forms of anxiety & that this has led to the hyper-vigilance that allows them to see threats …

… long before the more ‘relaxed’ members of society.

But … there is a high price that comes with that.

Although the body works as a whole,
I’m going to focus for now on the almonds …

… in your brain.

amygdala … , from Greek αμυγδαλή, amygdalē, ‘almond’, … are almond-shaped groups of nuclei located deep within the medial temporal lobes of the brain … [they]  perform primary roles in the formation and storage of memories associated with emotional events

To paint a more accurate picture of anxiety, let’s let the nutted almond illuminate us.

The fruit of the wild forms contains the glycoside amygdalin, “which becomes transformed into deadly prussic acid (hydrogen cyanide) …

… after crushing, chewing, or any other injury to the seed

Recalling that …

The amygdale is like a guard dog that never sleeps. It instantly senses danger and calculates magnitude of risk in microseconds

… it is most interesting to find that the bible should associate almonds with ‘watchfulness’:

In the Old Testament, the almond was a symbol of watchfulness and promise due to its early flowering, symbolizing God’s sudden and rapid punishment of His people …

In the Bible the almond is mentioned ten times, beginning with Book of Genesis 43:11, where it is described as “among the best of fruits.”

According to tradition, the rod of Aaron …

… bore sweet almonds on one side and bitter on the other; if the Israelites followed the Lord, the sweet almonds would be ripe and edible, but if they were to forsake the path of the Lord, …

… the bitter almonds would predominate

The almond blossom supplied a model for the …

… menorah which stood in the Holy Temple

The image of the almond tree, the first tree to bloom, reminds us

… of the watchful eye of God

 “The Hebrew name for almond is thus “shaked“, meaning watchful, wakeful, diligent, or alert.

“The Lord asked me: Jeremiah, what do you see?
I answered: I see a branch of an almond tree (shaked).
The Lord said to me:
You have seen right,
For I am watchful (shoked)

… to bring My word to pass” (Jeremiah 1:11-12)

It interests me very much now, how religion works – the implied threats that await us should we disobey.  Nothing is proven, all is implied:

Anxiety … is distinguished from fear, which is an emotional response to a perceived threat … anxiety is related to situations perceived as uncontrollable or unavoidable

… Another view defines anxiety as “a future-oriented

“Many times, these conflicts between unconscious fear & conscious events lead to a mysterious kind of numbing … The brain always chooses to shine it’s spotlight on fear above other emotions

Simultaneously seeing & “not seeing” the fear created twice the amount of activation that simply seeing the fear did … what was surprising … was that unconscious fear has a greater impact than conscious fear on brain activation

What you don’t know activates the amydala more than what you do know

It is the anticipation of fear that makes people spiral out of control or develop ways to avoid it … most of the unpleasant effects of fear … occur when we are …

 at a distance from it
the bark of fear is often worse than its bite

The amount of dread people felt was directly related to the amount of attention they paid to the possible negative outcomes

Without stories all this is mere information.

I grew up in an environment that I can now see was like a prison.  The anxiety of my mother required that we shut out the world.  We were immigrants to this country so no other family members were around to question what happened.  The message I absorbed was that there was great danger in the outside world & through other people:

Your own amygdala can create the identical electrical current in the amygdala of another person

I never knew what that danger was.

I still don’t.

She had sentenced us all into her world, the world where only she could feel safe

We each had our own cage which remained the same size.  As we grew physically we had less room in the cage to move

Now her world is shrinking & breaking, the house which once stood strong is oozing filth, hate, anger, suppression, death

I see this old frail woman breaking in parts, yet still fully consumed in hate & anger of her neighbour … they almost deserve each other.  Two sick souls consumed in self” (from a letter written recently by my sister)

If fear causes us to be consumed in self – then we come full circle back to identity.

But have we actually travelled anywhere?

The electrical energy of a thought can be converted into action if it is directed away or through the amygdala to an action centre in the brain.  Thus reiterating thoughts without connecting them to action closes the circuit before the bulb is turned on

I return to my feeling that those in the Truth Movement have highly activated amygdalae & this is why they picked up on the lies & threats awash in the world now.

But an intensively activated amygdala is also highly unreliable:

What we are therefore coming to see is that the amygdala affects the way we view the world

There may be too many times when our one-plus-oneing = 33:

when it perceives two segments of a line that are situated close enough together, the brain sees it as one continuous line.  In the same way, when presented with two closely related thoughts, it combines them to make up a story.  Fear stories abound in the human brain.  But we must be suspicious of them if we are to act at all

The decisions we have made about ourselves may affect how we see things.  How many in the truth movement feel like outcasts?

self-impression & level of anxiety may affect how you process subliminal fear … When faced with danger that registers on an unconscious level, your response will be greater if you are highly anxious … or if you feel socially undesirable

If we’re going to make a difference, we need to be asking clear-sighted questions, otherwise we become the conspiratorial equivalent of headless chickens.

If our desire is to create a healthy world that our loved ones & ourselves can live in, then I think it is worth entertaining the idea that many of us may have been shaped by extreme anxiety.  In the allowing of that possibility I am inclined to think we can begin to move forward into something good.

I feel that I have made vast leaps forward this year by seeing my past with honesty

Much of the challenge lies in finding a way to decrease the amygdala activation.  In psychological terms, this implies finding the right path to the amygdala by precisely identifying the fears that are activating it … sometimes you literally have to go where all this feeling lies

This need for truth in my own life has led to an increasing inner flexibility that no amount of conspiracy research ever supplied:

stories that support feeling “stuck” are almost never helpful, whereas stories that acknowledge difficulties but promote movement do help people move forward with their lives

The amygdala needs time to quite down before you can perceive positive things accurately

Remember that the amygdala does not just process fear: It processes all emotions, but it defaults to fear because it is so overwhelming

if you let your brain know that change is difficult but your fears are irrational, it will cooperate accordingly …  Our brains are much more cooperative than we think.  We just have to give them clear information about what our desires are

To return to where we started with the potential suffocation of identity, we can ask:

Can a wider focus actually contribute to our life AND to truth?

It is truly to your advantage to live in third person, because you will gain greater perception, & more of an ability to create what you want.”  It will help you appreciate differences & feel a stronger sense of your own  individuality.  In the first person you are comparing yourself to everyone else … You are limited to questions of identity … the first person inhibits accurate observation

When we listen to our passions, the amygdala stops growling & we are able to find what we need.  But when we fight this impulse, the amygdala roars even louder

I was pondering this morning about the ways in which we have been driven into self-obsession & recalled reading the words of a school teacher who pointed out how pupils are forced to go it alone in school.  This is an educational lie – in life we do not face every test & trial alone, instead we seek the help & advice of others who know more than we.  I wonder just how much schools have been behind our intense & anxious self-focus. If we equated self-obsession with being forced to go it alone we might see yet another way the amygdala has been forced into overdrive.

Text in this colour from “Creating” ~ Robert Fritz

Text in this colour from “Life Unlocked” ~ Srinivasan Pillay

October 24, 2011. Uncategorized.


  1. aferrismoon replied:

    “The Church of Satan is essentially a human potential movement, and members are encouraged to develop whatever capabilities they can by which they might excel. ”

    The ‘church’ grew up alongside the ultra-self-validating feminist movement as well as the gay church.

    Its all about pride in me who comes first otherwise its oppression and a hate crime speech.

    The Me!Dear Age [ approx. 3 years old]

    Al – Mond = God – World


    • alex robinson replied:

      You know as a recovering catholic I didn’t think their ethical practices sounded too bad :)

      Have been wondering this morning if the ‘me’ focus is actually a ‘coping mechanism’ for anxiety.

      Or perhaps a belief that constant attention of the surface-self will keep away the monsters of id that call for/demand a real connection with others & the world. Maybe keeping things on the surface keeps them monsters at bay!

      So you reckon God might be hard nut to crack?


  2. paulo replied:

    The shallow society … Great topic to dwelve upon alex … reality shows, survailence, social theatre profile facebook hide the psycopath game, like tsarion once sayd “the smiling depressives” body snatcher invasion, dont do your inner homework and the world (you-self) will self destruct.
    Self destruction in 1 hour 1 minute and 1 seconds … beep …

  3. michael sygar replied:

    When my son went to camp,it was obvious he was nervous.I suggested that when he felt anxious,he could become the character of Todd( his middle name).We agreed Todd was a cool cucumber and and kept his calm.The idea served him to great effect.In essence,by operating in the third person,the individual is capable of ‘directing’ their way through events. Thoughtful post as usual.

  4. kit replied:

    thanks .. these are always so much fun to read

    here ya’ go :

  5. sundaemon replied:

    Thanks for that – it all syncs so closely with my own inner journeyings of late, again, that my jaw was hanging slightly ajar throughout.

    It started when I was watching Winston Shrout and he said that commerce is a mirror,and it’s been around since Adam and Eve. When you look at yourself in a mirror, you are seeing the world, and yourself, inside out (“this anxiety always turns me ‘back in upon myself””). Put a pen mark on your right hand, look in the mirror, and it looks like the left hand, but knowledge of reality tells you that it’s still the right. So the view is inside out.

    Then there’s Narcissus, and how was he put to sleep? By being hypnotised by his own reflection in the mirror. It was narcotic, addictive, soporific. Instead of being part of the vibrancy of life, he is turned inside out and become at one with the lifeless world, the external world that does not have life until we bestow it.

    And there’s the Thinker by Rodin – I had been “thinking” how he reminds me of Narcissus; he’s there, a strong guy, but thinking away, inert, out of the equation.

    I had never noticed the ME/ chronic fatigue syndrome thing before. remarkable, and it fits.

    More coincidence, for the intrigue: I bought a bottle of Amaretto yesterday, a liquor made from almonds. Also, saw a Menorah in a town we were passing through and wondered about it. Still wondering.

    When you talk about living in third person, it reminds me of Eckhart Tolle, who says that to watch the Thinker inside you removes you from it, and brings you back to being present, the real you.

    Anxiety as well, from angst, German for fear, taking you into the future rather than being here in the present. Perhaps the mirror is also a time machine or time vortex, sucking us out of the present? That is to say, time itself is turned inside out too? When you create, you look inside yourself and become present again.

    Also on inside-outness, Winston Shrout also talks about how, in the world of commerce, we see only the public side of the ledger. The true self is private, is not subject to any laws or regulations or tariff, but we are presented with this mirror, and we see only as far as our surface from the outside. Were we to turn our eyes inward, we would see that we are actually free.

    You mentioned “information”, which in the ancient legal dictionaries is defined solely as “testimony used to indict.” Your mother becomes your first “informer”, and is actually named as such on many birth certificates.

    And with regard to identity, that is how the whole commerce thing kicks off – we hand over our title, our name, and from then on we’re sitting ducks. Whenever an official says “name”,whenever we give our signature, we offer ourselves up as surety to a dead body, a fiction, the name we were given at birth that us not us, but we allowed ourselves to think it was. The name, the identity, is the mirror. Identity theft is the only theft, and we can only do it to ourselves.

    Thanks again.

  6. sundaemon replied:

    Another thing, that phrase “tinker tailor soldier sailor” was arising for me, and perhaps it should be “thinker, weaver; soldier sailor.”
    That is, the thinker is lost in a web woven by the weaver; a planet of soldiers created by the maritime law which was woven via Roman canon law and the even more ancient Talmud.
    Mirror in Norwegian is speil.
    Same word (nearly) means “game” in German.
    As you say, magic “spiels” are cast with mirrors.

  7. tom cuddy replied:

    And so ends your creative drought, to fear or not to fear, was that the

    Bravo says I.

  8. alex robinson replied:

    Sorry for slow reply Paulo – I didn’t realise the clock was tickling :)
    Where would we be without someone monitoring us every second of the day – thank god we have a society that cares about our welfare so much!
    Keep smiling my dear

    What a grand story Michael – thanks for that!
    very best to you & your boy

    Gracias Kit – that had some interesting points to help put us back together!

  9. alex robinson replied:

    Wonderful thanks sundaemon – amazing ‘coincidences’ & lots of great thoughts & info – Narcissus was a great addition.

    A mirror is only a surface – has no depth, just the illusion of it – I think that’s what happening to many people – they’re committing surfaceide – to stay always on the surface is to dry up & die, I think.

    Identity is also very tied up with age – two illusions work hand in hand.

    As a mirror reverses things so I wonder if we’re actually living in a reversed world – everything is being done the wrong way round – sometimes we understand a little. Of late I have beem contemplating left & right. I have never been able to ‘learn’ my left from my right – I find that unless words & images match I get very stuck – just can’t process it – so I wondered “what if right is left & left is right”? – guess what – my mind can handle that no problem – it feels right/rite & I can get a sense of it – if we somehow have the rules round the wrong way, that might go a long way to explaining why we act so stupidly, so often, even when we try & be smart.

    Many thanks for that

    Cheers Tom :)

  10. aferrismoon replied:

    Ooops forgot to congratulate YOU on YOUR team winning the National Identity Rugby Cup – I hope THEIR win has lifted YOUR spirits and that you enjoyed the celebrations – world champions.

    Looking at the Hebrew for Almond –
    their lack of vowels makes it ‘shocked’ as well as ‘shaked’
    Num erically it is 300+100+4 = 404
    Another word with this enumeration = DTh – law, religion, faith , belief.

    All the best and don’t forget to identify with the All Blacks – buy a shirt : )


    • alex robinson replied:

      error 404 – identity not found!

      So James bond had almond martinis then – shoken, not stirred & Elvis was all ‘almonded’ up. I’d better stop before I get really silly.

      Yes aren’t you pleased to be acquainted with one of the winners

  11. Michael Skaggs replied:

    Brilliant, I feel so convoluted and shoked and shaken as of late due to being re-integrated into the Matrix and Hive Mind of the new job I am at.

    Crazy some of the stuff people do…like having Facebook open in two different browsers, etc.etc. I feel like I’ve been sucked back into massive negative energy wave despite the fact the people are pretty easy going.

    Great stuff Alex, Thanks for sharing!

    • alex robinson replied:

      Thanks Michael :)
      You know I just don’t get the popularity of facebook – I visit it occasionally, but always within minutes I begin to feel physically sick & have to withdraw.

      Work suffocates passion (as it was created to do) – I hope you find a fast route to your real passion – so many animals in need of love!

      Be well

    • mooochooo replied:

      working for someone else – what most people identify with as ‘work’. Working for someone else is usually death through commerce. One of the most profound feelings is of working, trading substance (self) and labour (from self, also substance), for fiction (fiat). This exchange is trading sunna (substance) for fiction (riba), and is banned in many traditions, including early christianity (as are other forms of riba, charging interest).

      People working together in an office environment carry with them this negative shared vibe. It’s very strong and can be difficult to deal with. I know I feel physically sick after a short time from merely being in an office with cold fluorescent lights, etc. The whole vibe of the place reminds me of the above circumstances that I am loath to be contributing to the misery path. Making it a point to ask ‘how’s it going’, sometimes helps these robots snap out of their programming. If I myself was part of the o33ice matrix, wow that’d suck.

  12. Joanne replied:

    Oh Alex – always raising the bar another hundred miles!

    As silly as it sounds to discuss ourselves in the third person, you’ve really got me here. This is some real, look in the mirror and know what you’re seeing type stuff – and how is that even possible, when we’re so crippled by the pressure to lock ourselves into what defines us?

    Sometimes we get so wrapped up in trying to define ourselves – period – that we begin to do so in terms OUTSIDE our Pure Selves. It’s a slippery slope – you’re right. Next, we first lose the ability to capture ourselves objectively… then next to follow is the loss of any ability to capture ourselves at all.

    You’re really onto something here – it gives Joanne more to think about than usual. Couldn’t have come at a better time, either. I always knew there was a reason why I felt uncomfortable with the idea of an About Me page on TheLoosh. As soon as I write it, it’ll be outdated :]

    After reading this, maybe taking some time to address one’s fears/anxieties is a great place to start (over). Sounds promising – perhaps I’ll even do this somewhere concrete… like on paper.

    This was worth reading twice. Thanks a lot Alex.

  13. Max replied:

    I recently stumbled upon this Argentinian band, calling themselves “Mueran Humanos”, which name is a grammaticaly incorrect spanish expression that has something to do with dying and humans.


    Carmen, one of the band members, created collages of mutilated young women on covers of fashion magazines. To me, this art symbolizes and uncovers the celebration of the centrifaction on peoples surfaces in all-day life and therefore the deep wounding of the self.

    In this context, also notice the self-consuming snakes on both sides of the home page. Can it be, that this snake can also be understood as a symbol for the feeding on your ego by yourself?

    So, as far as I understand, putting your energy into shaping and exposing your self image, instead into creation, is like feeding on your ego. You will become a living dead if you are constantly engaging in this circle of death until there is nothing of you left anymore.

    Kudos to you and celticrebel for bringing up the ego issue.

  14. Cenk replied:

    You touch very key points, as usual. I’ve been struggling with Chronic Fatigue Syndrome and anxiety for years. I’ve also been interested in conspiracy theories for a long time. But I’ve never thought that CFS and anxiety might have been related to self-obsession. These are very interesting connections you point out.

    CFS has isolated me too much from the outside world for the last few years and the more I isolated myself, the more weary I’ve become. Now I’m trying to find a way to break this vicious cycle. I realised that when I am motivated to something, I don’t feel tired. This is so important when struggling with CFS.

    Your mother’s anxiety reminded me of my father’s anxiety which might have affected me in a similar way you described. His anxiety was showing up as aggression. I loved him so much but at the same time I was nervous because of his aggression. I guess this conflict created a tension in me, which built some kind of a wall around me and made me turn to myself. It is really hard to bring down the walls if they were built when we were so young. I hope they are not too high as it is said in the song.

    All the best

  15. alex robinson replied:

    Joanne, Max & Cenk
    I wanted to acknowledge your great comments & then beg forgiveness for not replying further – am engrossed in my next article & it’s taking all my head-space.

    Thanks so much to all of you!

  16. Aaron replied:

    Hey Alex, brilliant article! I think you raised some amazing points, particularly about changing your self perspective from the first person to the third. You have manged to put into words something I have been trying to articulate within my head for a while now so I thank you. Much food for thought. By the way, I really enjoyed your last show with The Celtic Rebel : )

    • alex robinson replied:

      Gracias Aaron, I appreciate the feedback on the show & am always very pleased when these word-pictures find home – that comes when they meet someone halfway along the same road!

      very best to you

  17. Max replied:

    Actually, I wanted to post this last year.

    There is a video game developement company, called id Software.
    Amongst gamers, this company has a huge reputation for the first-person shooters they produced. Games of this genre are also called ego shooters.
    id Software took a great part in the popularization of ego shooters.
    The origin of this company’s name is explained right in the beginning of this text:

    Two of id Software’s most well-known franchises are Doom and Quake.
    In both franchises the enemy is either from another dimension or from outer space. Trent Reznor, band leader of the industrial rock band Nine Inch Nails, created the soundtrack for Quake, by the way. id Software’s most recent release is Rage. This game is placed in a post-apocalyptic waste land.

    Another famous alien-including ego shooter franchise is HalfLife from Valve Corporation.
    Especially the first part of this series revolves around conspiracy themes.

    So are we doomed by buying into one fraud after the other and have quacks telling us half-lies, attempting to fill up our half-lifes?

    Looking in this waste land for a valve to release all this rage?

    It’s certainly a nice idea to create your own valves.

    Hello, I am Max and the Truth Movement brought me here.

  18. alex robinson replied:

    Hello Max from the Truth Movement :)
    According to wiki “Id pushed the boundaries of video game technology—particularly 3D computer graphics technology” as well as upping the violence.

    I don’t understand the lure of video games at all, I would be interested in understanding the attraction – what makes them so attractive & to who are they attractive? You know I think this would make a good discussion – if a group of people were willing to talk of their passion for this media.

    very best to you

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