cautionary tails

To whom it may concern (or who may feel a little concerned):

This article is about
running away,
or …


out of harms way,
pulling apart,
not being loyal,
choosing only …

best bits

… the best bits &
leaving the rest.
becoming wild & dangerous
cranking up our ability to be
cranky with crap.

Five years ago I wrote an article on the enormous good sense …


… of

So what exactly is cowardice & why is this word so powerful, that a plethora of Presidents evoke its name in connection with some of the most questionable doings in recent history … 

“Terrorist acts are often described as cowardly


… Ronald Reagan called the 1983 United States Embassy bombing “cowardly“; Bill Clinton called the 1995 Oklahoma City Bombing and the 1998 United States embassy bombings “an act of cowardice” and “cowardly,” respectively; and …


… George W Bush called the September 11, 2001 attacks on the World Trade Centre and the Pentagon “cowardly.” Janet Reno also called Timothy McVeigh a “miserable little coward.” McVeigh responded, “Coward? This label would make Orwell proud – it is doublethink at its finest

So what is this thing that presidents love to spout about?

the more I look it, the more it seems to me that cowardice is a made up word that has no value, except as …


… a foil to the concept of heroism & I’ve been wondering if we, as a society, have not been the dead horse that has been well & truly flogged by this ideal

I wonder how many heroes-in-waiting have ever bothered to read the fine print in their ideal job description:

“First and foremost, the ancient Greek hero was a religious figure, a dead person who received cult honours & was expected in return to bring prosperity, especially in the form of fertility of plants (crops) and animals, to the community … The hero who is mortal must suffer & must die. Only after death can the hero receive immortalization in cult & in song … The hero must struggle against the fear of death, in order to achieve the most perfect death

Who’d have thought that death was one of the fine arts!

This love-affair with  …

crown of thorns

extermination seems to predominate during the adult stage of the homosapien life cycle. I am guessing that it has intimate connections to our species morbid addiction to fear.

I think, if we are interested in living, we’d best turn our attention to a group who is life-focused:

The first thing to know is that natural creatures, although …


… instinctively shy or timid, are not wildly governed by fears and terrors, as we have been misinformed from our youth up

Fear is an 


 exclusively human possession, or affliction; it is a physical and moral poison, as artificial as sin, which the animal escapes by virtue of being natural. It is doubtful, indeed, whether anything remotely resembling our fear …  is ever born into a hairy skin or hatched out of an egg. The natural timidity of all wild creatures is a protective and wholesome instinct~ How Animals Talk – William Long

~  ~   ~

My cat …


… has all the hallmarks
of a coward.

She runs away when I rustle a plastic bag, use the vacuum cleaner or make a sudden move (especially when she’s eyeing up the cockatiel).

It ‘s been easy to feel smugly superior to her ‘cowardly’ reactions .., yet on humble & closer inspection her behaviour becomes the sign of supreme intelligence.

although instinctively shy or timid, [animals] are …

flat out

… not wildly governed by fears and terrors

Today let’s play with the idea that the main reason animals are not governed by terror is because they consistently practice ‘the art of retreat’.

At the slightest hint of discomfort or danger they move away from the offending or threatening, object or event.

What if timidity and shyness are necessary requirements in continually “fine-tuning” their nervous system?

What if relaxed alertness accompanied by retreat maintains their exquisite natural balance?

What if the ability to be deeply aware of & respond to ‘what doesn’t feel right‘ is the foundation upon which their health & ease depend?

What if the act of retreat works on an etheric level – generating an ‘energy message’ through space and time, that animals highly value 


… ‘their own skins’

One of the most basic rules of existence is that, if you want to be good at something you have to keep practicing.  Over & over & over again.

retreat (n.)  c.1300, “a step backward;” late 14c., “act of retiring or withdrawing

We all know how important it is to take a step back when we need to get ‘the bigger picture’.

To withdraw is:

to take back

Perhaps animals re-commit to life by continuously ‘taking themselves back‘ – returning & retuning deep into their core as opposed to “heroically” thrusting themselves into harm’s way.

although instinctively shy or timid, [they] are not wildly governed by fears and terrors

The following verb is what sparked this article:

shy (v.2) … “to recoil


the feel of self

coil …
1. To wind in concentric rings or spirals
2. To move in a spiral course

The spiral has a universal appeal, and this fact is a sure indication of some mysterious resonance with the human psyche


…  Its early association with the Mother Goddess… suggests some kind of connection to the … miraculous process of life which is embodied in the Feminine – the door through which life enters this world. But why a spiral and not some other image? …

But there is another, abstract sense of the labyrinth spiral that is important. It is evocative of the bewildering choices we must make to find our way in the world “out there“, and the equally bewildering choices we must make to find our way “in here” – in the …


… tangled maze of our own inscrutable psyches. And the “Mystical Center” (known by many names – Axis Mundi, Immovable Spot, World Tree, Cosmic Pillar, etc.) is understood to represent a still and silent place (or state of being); it is the motionless heart, the focal nucleus around which …

swirly night

… spirals the whirling hurricane of space and time. It is the source from which all things come, and to which they endeavor to return for regeneration” Link

At the spiral’s center is where we find spiritual balance and realize our deep connection to the eternal forces of nature and the universe.

It could also have the meaning of energy radiating outward or inward (a spiral can go both ways depending on how you’re looking at it)

We can contemplate retreat as a dynamic movement towards the …


centre of life rather
than an ‘ignoble escape’ from pain or fear..

This leads to the reason behind today’s politically incorrect posting.

That we need to incorporate the practice of “retreat” into our daily lives, by developing the skill of discernment.

Discernment looks like this:

discrimination; acuteness of judgment and understanding


the quality of being able to grasp and comprehend what is obscure

a discerning individual is considered to possess wisdom, and be of good judgement; especially so with regard to subject matter often overlooked by others

Every day we are inundated with answers, news, facts, ‘truth’, concepts, the right way to do things, how we should be, who we should be because of who we once were, how we should act & look, what we should wear, what we should matter to us …

It is impossible to shut this crap off, or up, there’s just too much of it & too many people who choose to live it as their religion.

So we have to find ways to be connect with our sense of ‘something feels wrong’ – so we can retreat / ‘step back’ & re-gain our centre.

Those of you who have been reading my work for a while may remember a series of articles I did on the importance of darkness.

Now,it’s time to turn …


… to the light.

No, no, no not that light.

I think the light we have been sold is one more con job made possible by the forking tongue of the English language. Wherever there is a double-up of words, I think there is a great need to practice discernment.

Light is one of these forking places.

I believe the light we actually need is …


‘lightness’ …

softest touch

… of touch,
of hearing, of seeing, of understanding.

The simplest purest explanation of lightness would be …


… “play”.

With play you connect with things (ideas, objects, people) without loyalty – the connection lasts only as long as the playees are having fun – when the play is done, the connection is lightly dropped or sometimes even irreverently kicked away.

That is right & natural &
oh so healthy.

Once the experience has been internalised, it no longer needs to remain in our three-dimensional reality – unless we want to play more at a later time.

I have found, that I can find wonderful information anywhere. Sometimes it is one sentence in a pile of dross. Sometimes it is an entire book. And yet, even in the most wonderful of sources, I have always found at least one area of concern.

Sometimes this is content, sometimes it has to do with the heavy way information is handled or presented, leaving no room for exploration or play, especially in topics that desperately need this.

That’s where the practice of discernment & retreat
comes in.

Never give any information-supplier your loyalty (including me). No matter how life-changing their work, or how grateful you feel to them, stay in your centre, ready to spit out anything that tastes wrong.

Just because (up to) 99% of an article or idea seems fantastic doesn’t release us from our personal responsibility to become consciously aware of the 1% that ‘doesn’t sit right’. Discernment, like the ability to retreat, takes constant awareness & practice.

A healer I know said that discernment is located in the gut – if that is so, it makes gut feelings all the more worthy of our attention.

So STOP trusting the sources, no matter how wonderful they seem. You owe NO ONE your loyalty – loyalty cripples discernment.  When something doesn’t feel right …


I want to finish with a couple of excerpts. The first is from Robert Fritz ( a person I deeply admire & yet still retain distance from certain ideas). He makes an excellent case for the importance of retreating from toxic people:

From time to time you will need to rethink who you allow into your life. You are not obligated to surround yourself with those who would just as soon see you fail.

The mathematics of every relationship is this: It takes two to say yes, it only takes one to say no.  Perhaps there are those to whom you need to say no. To no longer have these people in your life may be an important secondary choice to your primary choice of the life you want to build.

I know this is hard advice. You may feel conflict of emotions when it comes to the people in your life. You may love them, like them, wish them success, want to be supportive, want to be a good friend. But, if they do not support you on some basic level, you may need to see them less often.

You take this action, not because you don’t like t hem, but because you support your own life building process more.

Sometimes you need to take a stand in favor of yourself. Sometimes you need to change the cast of players with whom you surround yourself. This may be one of the most strategic choices you can make on behalf of your own well-being

And finally a snippet from Matt Delooze – a person to whom I am deeply grateful & yet still hold reservations about. This is what discernment is – using all the information available to you in your personal quest, while boldly & constantly confirming that you highly value your own skin & owe no one your loyalty. This snippet comes from Matt’s latest ayahausca trip & contains a potentially powerful example of the ‘disloyalty’ necessary for discernment:

“I noticed there was a large drum in the room. I went to look at it. I noticed the drum had many symbols on it …

The man then approached the drum and tipped it on its side. He then took the small fire out of the hole in the wall …

The man then placed the drum over the fire and as he did the ‘skin’ on top of the drum literally illuminated an image that was imprinted on the drum skin. Not only that it reflected the same image onto the ceiling of the room and in the process the image was enlarged and it literally covered the whole ceiling. It was the exact same image that was on the shield, it was the animal spitting out the ‘atl tlachinolli’ symbol. It was a strange feeling because the flames made the animal look like it was actually alive. The fire under the drum made the animals belly look like it was breathing!

The room was now pretty dark because the fire, the only light in the room, had been placed under the drum.

The man in the room started chanting when the image appeared on the ceiling and he started dancing around. For some reason I joined in too. I’m sure it meant something important but even if we were just dancing in the dark it sure felt right.

I then danced over to the drum and I started banging on it with my stick. I was chanting and wailing away like a master shaman would. As soon as I hit the drum it was like thunder going off. It wasn’t a like a drum sound at all and each time I hit the drum the sound made me look up to the ceiling, and when I did so it caused the image on the ceiling to shake and it appeared like the dog type creature was literally being sick and spitting out. I think I hit the drum four times and four times the dog spit out and each time I hit the drum it caused a thunder sound. It was like an ancient version of Hollywood special affects were taking place. I felt elated to be banging on the drum.

I then removed my mask and placed it on the drum and when I did the fire under the drum illuminated that too. The mask literally took the form of a lamp.

The mask on top of the drum also created another reflective image on the ceiling. It created a sort of circular planet Earth image and it made the ‘spitting’ dog look like it was being sick on it. I looked up and wept one tear over what I saw.

For some reason I i put my finger in my tear and then put my finger in my mouth. I then spat on the mask/lamp myself and said to the man in the room with me ‘It’s done’. I then wildly kicked the drum over and the mask fell to the floor.

… I was laughing and scared at the same time but I knew hitting that drum and then kicking it over meant something to me inside and I knew it would eventually mean something to others inside them one day too.

Once I thought that I seemed to instantly wake up from the affects of the Ayahuasca

When you hold ideas lightly, you can also lightly let them go if & when you need to move in a new or different direction.

Don’t anchor yourself to anyone, including me.  Practice discernment. Practice valuing your own skin every day of your life.

October 22, 2013. Uncategorized. 7 comments.

high definition suncronicity

The title of the chapter I wrote for The Sync Book II 


The Colour of Suncronicity
was, of course,
a ‘typo’.

I had been typing ‘syncronicity’, but my finger hit ‘u’ instead of ‘y’.

The exquisite perfection of that unword for that article could not be denied, so it stayed.

In the beginning of this article, I mis-typed again.

So I’ve pondered the wisdom of giving this unword ‘suncronicity’, its own existence.

There were doubts. I have some serious concerns about how the sun is (mis) used in secretive circles.

Displayed in plain sight, but not mind, of our culture, lies a …


… glut of sun-focused sacrifice.

Combine any ritual …

two sun

… with a son/sun & watch while
body counts rise
death falls …


 from the sky.

Earlier I spoke with my Nigerian friend, remembering a conversation we’d once had where he’d mentioned that the greatest sacrifices seem to occur when the sun is …


… at its highest point.

My friend also talked of religions & how he believes their main purpose is to generate fear.

Now I’m wondering if sun worship is used specifically to trigger, generate & then maintain fear in this world.

Certainly, the sun does seem to be an …


… activating principle –
sweeping life into movement & flurry or fury.

My friend’s uncle who was a healer impressed upon him this most fundamental reality:

That which heals, can also kill

This most basic truth is something we consistently side-step in our search for cure-alls and absolute answers.

Perhaps it is time to consciously use what we have unconsciously acquiesced to for too long. Directing the energy of the sun according to our needs & not as directed by religions or others who know a lot more than we do.

So yes, let’s claim the word ‘suncronicity‘ for this place & all who use it,  It becomes a tool for our own strengthening & a framework for our expansion.

Of interest: I came across the following in the, often uncanny work, of astrologer, Anne Ortlee’s write up for today:

… The end is here. Sun squares Kronos so you approach the matter with delicacy but a deep understanding that things are shifting

At almost the same time, my friend Max, who played an unknown part in what follows, sent these words:

I can feel that there is a momentum A world collapsed and another one rises

In my life now, I feel exactly what Max is talking about.

So let’s flesh out our new word, suncroncity.

In our present world, ‘syncronicity‘ is a fast-growing buzz word.

And why not? It’s cheap & portable.

And like present-world sex, you get a …


… concentrated (& not particularly long-lasting), high.

Syncronicity is very much about YOU.

Suncronicity, on the other hand, doesn’t have a lot to do with highs & it’s not about you. That said it does have a lot to do with authorship:

An author is broadly defined as “the person who originated or gave existence to anything” and whose authorship determines responsibility for what was created

Suncronicity is the result of hard work, dedication & intention – you do not physically bring the syncing ingredients into reality, but you do author or instigate them, all the same.

The phenomenon of syncronicity is not independent from your action, but is an indirect outcome of your action. Had you not done your work, the miracle could not have been evoked. If you set your creative process in motion, dimensions beyond your control, but not your influence, will begin to emerge with startling regularity” ~ Robert Fritz

As is so often the case, Robert Fritz paints things very lucidly. I could almost have stopped there, but I’m going somewhere uncharted & that requires the creation of new words & ideas.

So let’s continue with suncronicity.

There is no ‘high’ or ‘wow’ feeling because, rather like the full force of the sun, it can leave you stunned & sunburned.

With suncronicity we are actively working towards generating change, creating clarity, healing – it’s so much bigger than our own lives – it is life working correctly for the advancement of life.

Very simplified we might call it ‘super-syncronicity with heart & fire’.

So let me quickly back up & then proceed with today’s tale.

A little while ago I told the story of a woman who died from pricking her finger with a needle. That article & every one since (& some before) are connected to something much bigger – an unwritten article.

That unwritten article seems to be putting down the roots it needs in order to exist.  Robert Fritz would call it structural tension.

What follows is both suncronicity & another root laid down …

Last week I took a couple of photos of window reflections for the Humanizenz site.

Only when I downloaded this one …


… did the image of ‘crucifixes’ appear consciously to me.

I posted the image under the title “Crucifying the Mind”.

Two days later, I randomly picked up the book Meaning-full Disease & took it to a cafe with me. Randomly I opened it & began to read:

I described one of Groddeck’s cases, a man with retinal (eye) haemorrhages originating in a traumatic incident to do with a crucifix

There was no buzz of excitement that you get with a nifty sync, instead my mind almost came to a halt & then glazed over. The author suggested I return to the full story of this man which was posted earlier in the book. The story:

… involved a man who, as a teenager; … was taught shoe-making …


… Among those who came to the shop was a certain …


blind man who all the village people called a blasphemer of God … (who) made an unforgettable impression on the boy. After a time (the boy) gave up shoe-making … for he was suffering from retinal haemorrhage, and the doctor warned him he must find some other work less trying to the eyes.

Years later he came to consult me … his eyes had gradually got worse … the oculist had told nothing more could be done for him. The retinal haemorrhage was continually starting anew …


autumn was the worst time for the haemorrhage, and he also suffered from great depression in the autumn  … I asked him whether anything serious had ever happened to him in October, but he said there was nothing.  As I was not convinced, I asked  him to name any number, and he gave me ‘eight‘. To my further question whether anything had happened to him when he was eight years old, he again replied in the negative.

At that point it occurred to me that he had told me how the blind man was called …


… a blasphemer of God, so I asked him whether he had ever blasphemed God. He laughed and said he had been a very pious child, but for many years now he had ceased to trouble himself about these things … Suddenly he stammered, grew pale and fell back in the chair unconscious.

When he came to himself again he fell weeping on my neck, saying” “Doctor, you are right, I am a blasphemer of God, just as the blind man was, of whom I told you, I have never told a single soul about, not even in confession, and now when I think of it, I find it almost unbearable. And you are right too about the autumn, and about my being eight years old.

It all happened in the autumn of the year I was eight. In my home district, which is strictly Catholic, there are wooden crucifixes on the borders between one village and another. At one such structure we, my brothers and I and a few other boys, were throwing stones, when I was so unfortunate as to …


… knock the figure of Christ from the crucifix so that it fell and broke in pieces. This is the most terrible experience of my whole life.

After their consultative relationship began, Groddeck and his patient explored together two episodes of eye haemorrhage, and found they related in one instance to getting off a tram at a place where  a crucifix stood, and in the other instance to the site of an iron cross worn by an ex-soldier.

This cleared up from that time, thirteen years ago, no haemorrhages have occurred. Yet now he is a book-keeper and must use his eyes more that most people

This real-life story was set in early twentieth century Germany. When I took my photo I had been thinking of Max, who is German, & that he’ might enjoy the image of the woman.

Meaning-Full Disease is a book that allows illness to have highly specific meanings for the person who experiences it. Through many examples it provides ‘proof’ enough to strongly suggest that illnesses tell a story.

I think the lesson of suncronicity today is take the story of the man with crucified eyes gently to heart. I know, I know it seems such a childish tale.

And that’s exactly it – It IS a childish tale.

And that is its enormous significance.

It shows us that what we figured out as children, can be the central organising principle of our lives.

At no point did this man’s adult body rebel & tell him to ‘grow up’ – instead it organised itself around this emotional ‘truth’ – wrapping around & shaping itself to it, giving it the same validity …


… that water does to a rock.

Even the healthiest of children often do not have access to the information they need when growing up, but children from trauma homes grow up in varying states of insanity, lies & betrayal – so they are forced into figuring out life from scraps, pain & fear. I hope you can get this:

Often out of great necessity, we figure out LIFE at young age & when we have figured it out enough so that we can keep living (in some twisted form or another), that ‘figured-out’ take on reality, becomes the central organising principle of our lives.

I think all the fucked up bits in our lives that we try & try to change & then ‘seem’ to fail, are actually working perfectly in tandem with this core figuring out.

Your suncronicity mission today, if you choose to accept it, is to return to your childhood, gently, & figure out what your child self figured out about life long ago.

October 2, 2013. Uncategorized. 21 comments.